Mommy and Daddy are Boring

Hey guys, Dexter here. I just needed to get a few things off my chest. I have NO idea what is going on with Mommy and now Daddy is acting weird, too.

I'm so cute, how could you NOT want to play with me?

I enjoy playing with Mommy on the floor and biting her. Then she throws my toys and we tug back and forth and wrestle for a bit. Now all of a sudden Mommy doesn't want to do that anymore. She wants to lay on the couch with her (and Daddy's?) hands on her belly. They sit there with their hands on Mommy's belly, then look at each other and giggle.

Here I am sniffing Mommy's belly to see what all the hoopla is about.
Daddy is holding my paws back because now I'm not allowed to walk all over Mommy anymore.
Hrrrmph!

Now whenever I try to get Mommy to play, I give a few good nips on the hands before she yells for Daddy. Then Daddy will come and scoop me up and put me on the other side of "the gate." There are now four gates in my house! My house has become a prison!!!

My life is so boring. I think I'll take a nap on Daddy's lap.

There is a big gate that keeps me away from Daddy's computer, a gate that keeps me out of my favorite place to poop inside the house (the dining room), a gate that keeps me from the TV room, and a gate that keeps me away from ALL of the rooms upstairs. What the heck?

I am so bored now, all I want to do is take naps.

Daddy and I both fell asleep on the couch while Mommy was watching something called "Honey Boo Boo?"

I finally decided to cozy up to Mommy and see if I could get close to her belly without Daddy's iron-clad grip on me. I sniffed Mommy for awhile and decided to lay down on her with my bone to get better accquainted. I normally do not do this with Mommy. Daddy is my favorite and normally I want to be wherever he is, but I gave Mommy a chance. While I was laying on her belly, I'm pretty sure something moved in there. Maybe she ate too much pizza?

WHAT was that? A gurgle? An alien? Is Mommy's stomach exploding?

I think I will leave all the belly touching to Mommy and Daddy! Maybe I will figure out what is going on soon. They better not be getting another pug. I do NOT want them to pay attention to something other than me!