Preface
January 15, 2013: After work I went shopping at the
Promenade Shops to look for a birthday gift for my mom…which was the day
before. I thought I knew where the shop was I wanted to go to, but I was wrong.
I did a lot of walking, then more walking to find a restroom. I didn’t find
anything I liked for my mom, so I headed back to my car and called my best
friend Jess on my way home. I joked that I had walked around so much that I would
probably go into labor that night. Jess said she hoped so!
Super early morning
January 16, 2013
I (begrudgingly) tried to roll over in bed to lay
on my right side when I got the incredible urge to pee. This had happened a lot
of times during the last few weeks of my pregnancy, but never this bad. I
hoisted myself and put my hand “down there” because I was sure half my pee
would end up in the hallway on the way to the bathroom. As soon as I sat down,
my water broke! I yelled to Jason, “It’s 3:46 a.m. and I think my water broke!!”
*Silence* “Jason! I’m going to call my mom!!!”
I call my poor parents and rouse them out of bed. I later
learn that they didn't fall back to sleep. (I’m sorry!) I call the on-call
doctor who tells me that I need to head to the hospital to “make sure that your water broke.”
Thankfully Jason and I had our bags, Paige’s bag, and even
Dexter’s bag (he would be staying with Auntie Jessi and Uncle Brian) packed and ready to go. So I’m sitting on the toilet still and
decide that I need to straighten my hair. Right, cause that makes sense? So
Jason forgoes a shower and breakfast and starts getting everything ready to put
in the car. I am wearing 2 huge pads and wet pants while straightening my hair
and applying foundation. I grab a pop-tart on my way to the car and text my 4
best girlfriends that I’m heading into the hospital! In a sleet storm!! At 4:30
in the morning!!
Early morning
We check-in and register at the hospital. I immediately need
to sit in a wheelchair. Not because I was having contractions or pain—I was
still gushing water. I had heard that once your water breaks, it can continue
gushing until the baby comes out. I guess I didn’t believe it, but it’s the
truth!
Jason wheels me up to the L&D unit where we met our
first round of nurses—Rachel and Shana. We thought that was cute since Jason’s
siblings are named Rachel and Shane. We took it as a good omen. Until Rachel
and Shana stabbed me too many times to get a good vein for my IV. They blew a
vein in my left forearm and holy crap—that hurt. Then they bring in another
nurse named Sally who looked and acted SO much like my Aunt Debbie, it was
awesome. I have to give credit to Jason because he told the previous nurses
that they were done sticking me, haha. (Jason also felt faint during this first
IV mishap, poor guy). So Sally/Aunt Debbie was able to successfully stab me in
the right forearm. (Note: I had a ginormous bruise on my left arm for weeks
after I came home from the hospital).
So after the IV was in, I had a cervical check. This doctor
was able to confirm that my water had broken and I was 3 cm already. I was
wheeled into a room and started on Pitocin.
Morning
Shift change! I received a new nurse/angel named Michelle.
This was a woman after my own heart. She was organized, almost obsessively, was
kind, and was an AMAZING birth coach. She also looked like Jason’s Aunt Carol!!
(Crazy how we found everyone’s dopplegangers in the hospital!).
Jason, who hadn’t eaten anything and was going on 3 hours
sleep, was forced to go to the cafeteria for some breakfast. He finally agreed.
While he was gone I chatted with Michelle. She said that she was able to read a
few contractions on my chart—was I feeling anything yet? Nope! Hey, maybe this
whole baby thing will be easy. Ha.
Jason came back from the cafeteria and we were talking for a
little bit when all of a sudden mid-sentence—I can’t breathe. The baby has a
knife in there and is stabbing blindly at my abdomen. After it had passed, I look at Jason and
giggled, “I think that was a contraction?”
Dr. Chang (who is NOT from my practice, looks like a young
Michelle Kwan, and spoke so softly I could barely hear her) comes in to do another cervical check.
She says I am now 5 cm. Yay! As soon as she left the room—I felt waves and
waves of contractions. I could barely breathe. This is definitely the most
intense pain I’ve ever felt up until this point. I can’t even describe it.
People said it can feel like “incredibly bad menstrual cramps.” NO. It felt
like cramping, stabbing, burning, etc. all at once. I tell Jason immediately
that I need the epidural.
Mid-Morning
After waiting for the anesthesiologists to show up (for over
an hour), and then waiting 45 minutes for them to start the process of the
epidural, I was having contractions mere minutes apart…and I was standing.
Michelle assured me that standing, although difficult impossible, would ensure
that the baby would drop further. So I’m standing, clutching Jason, while the
two anesthesiologists take their grand ol' time setting this up. After creating
a “sterile field,” they tape up my back, and I have to sit on the edge of the
bed, “curl” my back (they called this the “angry cat position”) and again,
clutch Jason. Jason was feeling faint and needed to sit. I was jumping with every contraction and
every time they tried to stick me with the needle. So another nurse was rushed
in with a chair and juice for Jason and nurse/angel Michelle took over. I
clutched this nurse for a good 45 minutes while they put in the epidural. The
epidural was not “placed” properly the first time.
As someone who does NOT do well with needles (I passed out
having my belly button pierced), I could barely keep it together. I tried to
remain calm, tried not to jump through the ceiling as they took the line out
and re-inserted it. It feels like a needle going into your back, and then tiny
gnomes with hammers running up and down your spine banging on it, while an electric current traveled the spine as well. Such a weird
sensation.
I will say one thing though. Pain of the contractions is WAY
worse than the pain of receiving an epidural.
Early afternoon
Now that I’m set up with the epidural and not feeling the
contractions (ahhhh) Michelle made Jason and I promise that we’d try to sleep.
We actually did! We took about an hour nap before I woke Jason up and said “there
is so much pressure in my butt…I don’t know what’s going on.”
We buzzed Michelle into the room who checked me and said it
felt like I was 10 cm! She then buzzed Dr. Chang aka Michelle Kwan, who checked
me and confirmed I was 10 cm. Then she buzzed Dr. De La Vega, from my practice,
who checked me and said “Well, you can start pushing if you want.”
What? If I want?? Yes, let’s get this show on the road!!!!
If I would have known then what I know now… I should have
waited. There is a huge, huge difference between “coached pushing” and “pushing.”
I felt SO much pressure “down there,” but no “urge” to push. Since I couldn’t
feel my contractions, I was pushing when Michelle and Jason told me to. “Pushing”
means “pretend like you are trying to have a bowel movement.” I heard “Push
through your bottom!” about a few zillion times, followed by the barely audible "pushpushpush" from Dr. Chang.
After about an hour, I gave up. I cried, threw a fit, told Jason
I wanted to have a c-section. He kept reassuring me I could do it.
Now it was getting unbearable. THIS is the most intense pain
I’ve ever felt in my life…ever. They had turned down my epidural so I could
feel when I needed to push. So now I was feeling contractions, feeling an
insane amount of pressure, including a new burning sensation.
I gave up again. Nurse/angel Michelle grabbed my hand and
put it on my baby’s head! She looked me in the eyes and said “Heather. She is
right there! You can do this! Now get mad!!!”
After over two hours of pushing, Paige’s head was out! Jason
was beyond excited. They were telling me she had “tons of hair!!!” which was
the strength I needed to bring the rest of her into the world.
Michelle put Paige directly on my chest for “skin-to-skin”
contact just like we wanted. Paige let out one cry as if to say “Hey! I’m here!”
and that was it. She laid peacefully on my chest as Jason and I checked her over
from full head of hair to her 10 little toes. She had dark, curly (??!!) hair
and lots of it, she was definitely a girl, her cheeks were the chubbiest we’ve
ever seen, she had long fingers and toes like her Daddy and she even had hair
on her ears!!
I said “Hi baby! Hi Paige! Happy Birthday!” and gave her the
first kiss of roughly the two million she’s since received.
The biggest dream I ever had for my life has come true—I am
a mom.
Paige Olivia—1/16/13—7 lbs, 3 oz.—20 inches